Saturday, August 27, 2016

Pancakes and Pizza Burgers!

Just as the title implies, that's exactly what I ate today. Sidney so kindly used up some slightly expired milk by making pancakes this morning, and they're the most beautiful pancakes I've ever seen. I mean, just look:

And since I know this recipe, I know that they need nothing more than a little butter on top. Really, they don't even need butter. They are perfectly delicious without butter, but butter.

I couldn't help myself, so I had three more.

And again, butter.

I also had to have a brotein bar to break up the carbs and to make sure my muscles don't turn into fat, because that happens.

To complement the brotein bar, I had some more carbs. I felt as though the 20 grams of brotein was slightly overkill after the 300 grams of carbs I just ate, so I had to resupplement with some more carbs.

For dinner, I had some more carbs.

Yes, that's right. I literally had the bottom half of a burger bun for dinner, and that was it.


Of course not! That was just the beginning. On top of this bottom burger bun went...

...and then, on went...

...and finally, on went the top bun.

So let's recap. Bottom burger bun, left over frozen pizza, massive burger with copious amounts of Velveeta, top burger bun. Seems about right!!

In fact, it seems very right. Everything about this should have been not good. I mean, it was very mediocre pizza and a huge serving of rather old ground beef. Just about the only saving graces would be the cheese and bun. But actually everything just went so well with everything else that the whole thing was delicious.

I can only imagine how good this would be with a fresh toasted brioche bun, Leo's pizza, a smaller burger patty, and either some Velveeta or some fresh shredded cheddar or other amazing cheese. What this means is that that will happen someday, and when it does, I'll report back (most likely from food heaven).

Friday, August 26, 2016


As previously mentioned, my pet jumping spider's name is Ruth. More on her in a little bit. 

First, for breakfast, a brotein bar.

Then, for lunch, a brotein bar.

For dinner, we determined that it was a good night for a frozen pizza. I think we may be becoming a little too dependent on these things.

Notice how most of the toppings are skewed to the right. Oh well, that'll be Sidney's half...

Being a nice person, though, I at least attempted to redistribute the toppings more evenly about the pizza.

I had half of the pizza, but since this wasn't enough carbs, I added a piece of left over garlic bread.

I also had a salad, again obviously to offset the carbs. Pay no attention to those sneaky carbs in the salad itself.

A little later, an interesting cloud drifted by our house. Pretty neat.

But not long after that, it cleared up and made way for a nice sunset.

To celebrate the sunset, I had a cookie!

And I had some milk, because cookie.

Oh, I should also mention that I was in the mood for some ice cream. So I had some ice cream, which is basically just like frozen milk, so.

Now, back to Ruth. She's my little pet. I toyed with other names, like "Spiderbro", for example, before settling on the more mature "Ruth." I figured that when it involves someone else's name, I shouldn't bro it up too bad. Ruth is still slightly bro, though, since it's related to sports. But ain't she a beauty???

It is now my responsibility to nurture Ruth while observing her every move. While this is not entirely possible, it is also my responsibility to observe her and eventually write a paper about her. Ruth, you are a superstar in the northeastern Kansas jumping spider community.

Thursday, August 25, 2016

National Burger Day!!!

Heck yes! This is a National Holiday that I can get on board with! Granted, it's a UK thing, but no matter! Technicalities matter not when burgers are forecast! 

But first, and for the second day in a row, I remembered to have breakfast! This morning, I shared breakfast with my beautiful pet jumping spider Ruth. 

Why Ruth, you ask? Great question! First, not being able to actually tell, I assume my spider to be female. Second, since this is a jumping spider, I decided to name her with the likeness of Ruth Beitia, the Rio 2016 Olympic High Jump gold medalist. Seems fitting to me, so there we have it.

Throughout the school day, I purposefully refrained from eating anything else in preparation for the burgers that were to come later. When I got home, Sidney was just about to leave for a babysitting gig, so I decided to wait for her. In the meantime, bad things happened. I spotted some old candy in the fridge and decided that it really needed to go. I started with some almond M&Ms.

I then had another plastic egg full of them.

Then I found some old Reese's cups that were had far outstayed their welcome. They simply had to go.

Then, I noticed some aging prunes and chocolate covered pecans in the cabinet, so I delighted in their eviction as well.

When Sidney finally arrived back home, I got down to business.

The burgers were mixed with chopped onions and an egg for binding.

For the assembly, I started out with toasted Hawaiian buns and spread a layer of Boursin on the bottom bun.

Then on went the Velveeta covered burgers.

Then I added some raw onions for flavor and texture.

Then I spread some mayonnaise on the top bun.

And that was it. Not too fancy, but not too basic either.

One thing is for sure, though, and that is that these things look delicious! Let's eat!

Oh, yeah, it's really as good as it looks. And if you're envious, sorry not sorry!

For dessert, I had another left over cookie.

Wednesday, August 24, 2016

I remembered to eat today!

As the title reads, I did in fact remember to eat before dinner today! Go me. I had a brotein bar for breakfast...

...and another for lunch! I'm on a two-meal roll!

I then stopped by Sidney's parents' house, where I found some soup and crackers. Of course I had to have some! I don't want to be rude, after all...

A little later, the weather decided that it didn't like the pristine (ha) condition my car was in, so it decided to take matters into its own hands.

Luckily, my car managed to escape without any major injuries.

But all was forgotten when dinner time came about, since we still had some leftovers from last night. I added a plum for some added sugar.

We also had some leftover sweets from last weekend. What would I choose?

Ahh, yes. A brownie all to myself is a rarity that must be taken advantage of, and take advantage of it I did!

Tuesday, August 23, 2016

Why do I keep forgetting to eat?!

Again it happens! Same story as yesterday, so again we fast forward to dinner. Today it was a bit more exciting than frozen pizza. 

Check that, much more exciting.

Today, Sidney and I made Fettuccine Alfredo with garlic bread, all from scratch (unless you count the bread itself, which we unfortunately did not bake).

But we made the Fettuccine Alfredo (with chicken) from scratch.

And we took said pre-baked bread...

...sliced it horizontally and spread some tasty butter and fresh minced garlic and parsley on it...

...and BOOM! Garlic bread!

I ended up with about half the pasta and a liberal serving of bread. Carb at me, bro!

To offset all the carbs, I had a healthy Caesar salad.

And to be really healthy, I had some more salad for dessert.

Don't mind that bread in there, it's only there to maintain the balance between carbs and healthiness.