Saturday, January 9, 2016


I'll keep it short and savory. It was another day of travel, but the destination was reached.

Breakfast was nothing but a classic bro meal: 8 hard boiled eggs.

A travel snack of another chicken salad sandwich. 

And of course half a donut. 

Dinner was tragic. About an entire pizza's worth of carbs (and salt) were inhaled. Luckily there was room for a cookie to make it worse. 

Friday, January 8, 2016

Treacherous Travel = Unscrupulous Eatery

We've all been there. We know the trials and tribulations of a long day in the car with your bros. It's fun, but eating suddenly becomes an unbromantic free for all. For instance, today I had a some nice sausage balls for breakfast, because brotein.

For a snack while on the road, some chips dipped in peanut butter, because brotein.
A short while later, I was feeling in need of more brotein, so I invoked an dear old friend. Chicken salad and I have been bros for as long as I can remembro, and it never fails me in times of great need. Today is no different.
The broment of mental destitution finally arrived when the traditional dinner hour came and went. Bathroom breaks were imminent, and when we pulled of the highway, alas, there was a Wendy's. Spicy chickens, fries, and a super cute baby mini micro vanilla Frosty rounded out my day of alimentary addition. 

Thursday, January 7, 2016

O Bromeo, Bromeo, wherefore art thou Bromeo?

Much like the flaky romantic tragedy character Romeo Montague, occasionally brotein goes missing from my life. And when I say missing, I more so mean it doesn't comprise a majority of my calories for the day. Today was one of those days, but it was well worth it. Let's jump right in to this.

For breakfast, I was presented with (yes, presented) with fluffy yummy pancakies, and one simply doesn't not say no to such a delight.
Moving on to dinner, I was in for a real delight. The rare, mysterious, and highly coveted delight that is eggs Benedict is the delight in question. Words do no justice, so following are a couple pictures of this wonderful gustatorily-approved experience.

Wednesday, January 6, 2016

More Brotein???

Of course! To repeat the events of Tuesday, I had a total of 3 scoops of brotein in the morning, one pre- and two post-workout. And since I picked up a lot of heavy stuff today, my body needed a replenishing store of glycogen so it didn't opt instead to consume my muscles in an anabolic brotastrophe. To stave off this bro-tragedy, I consumed a confection of white chocolate, peanut butter, marshmallows, rice crispies, and chocolate chips.
But this indulg...ahem, carb re-feed...certainly did not compose the majority of my caloric intake for the day, as much as I would've enjoyed if it had. But I'm not one to skip out on some mmm mmm good brotein! For dinner I had some delicious vegetable soup. Now, I know what you're thinking. But this particular vegetable soup is only so in an academic sense. Sure, it has some vegetables, but it's also got a hefty load of ground beef, and chunks of beef as well. I ended up with two large bowls.

Tuesday, January 5, 2016

Keep the Brotein Flowing

After yesterday's farewell to carbs, I thought it necessary to attempt the same today. Now, I don't subscribe to the "no carbs, no exceptions" ideology, but I do think that a limited carb diet is most effective when it comes to keeping body fat off. That's not to say that overall weight will or won't change, but a gross excess of carbs get stored as fat fairly readily. A high proportion of brotein also helps maintain existing muscle, since muscles themselves are mostly protein.

All this leads me to today's dining selections.

For breakfast, a chicken thigh and a hard boiled egg.
For dinner, a buffalo chicken pita with spinach, red pepper hummus, pepper jack cheese, and ranch. A side of kettle chips and a drink consisting of the finest dihydrogen monoxide round out the meal. 
And, being a Tuesday, one simply does not not get buy one get one free ice cream. But this is not just any ice cream. This is the best ice cream in the world, and it simply cannot be denied. And yes, it's the best ice cream in the entire world. And I know, I've had all the ice cream in the world. But, with all the carb loading I've been doing, I opted for the junior instead of the unnervingly large single (two scoops) in a waffle cone that I usually get. 

Monday, January 4, 2016

BIG Update...

And I mean BIG. Today was a big day. Everything about it was big. I woke up, went to the gym and got huge, and then went and got an InBody bioelectrical impedance analysis body scan to assess the hugeness. The votes have been tallied and the results are in. And they do not disappoint on hugeness.

According to the results, my "vitals" are:

Total body weight:............178.7 lbs
Lean body mass:...............150.4 lbs
Skeletal muscle mass:.........86.6 lbs
Body fat mass:....................28.4 lbs

These figures equate to a body composition of 15.9% body fat. Ideally, I would like to be in the 8-10% body fat range, but that ain't happening while eating big. That endeavor is slated to begin later in the year, around the time referred to by some as March.

But I digress.

To realistically track a body transformation, numbers on paper aren't the most important determinant. The most important barometer of body transformation is the Mirror Test. This test is relatively straight forward to perform. Simply stand in front of a mirror and assess. If a change in physical appearance is observed, progress is taking place. There is one important caveat worthy of consideration. There's no need to perform the Mirror Test on a daily basis. Doing so would be akin to watching grass grow. Body transformations happen slowly, so once a month is plenty for this test; any more frequent and any changes may go unnoticed.

So, I will perform a variation of the Mirror Test. Sadly, though, to avoid the stigma of the overdone mirror selfie, I will post a traditional photograph of my physique.

So, with all that being said, here is the initial canvas.

And on a different note, with it's schedule, today's food aspect was much less diverse. I had a scoop of protein before the gym, two scoops after, and some grilled chicken for dinner. It was tasty, though, and it reminded me of how much I love me some good old-fashioned brotein. 

Sunday, January 3, 2016

Back to Basics

After surviving the last few days' carbtastrophe, I thought I'd get back to some fundamental eating principles. Principles specific to getting huge include several important ideas. First, and most obvious, is quantity. Duh. But second, is quality. Quality refers to macronutrients, of which there are three: carbohydrates, fats, and broteins. When getting huge, it's important to consume tons of brotein, especially when lifting weights occurs less frequently. Thus tonight, my dinner was light on carbs, heavy on brotein. And after all, an average bro needs his brotein. But to avoid any withdrawal-like symptoms, I also had a dark chocolate pecan cluster to compliment my four chicken legs.

One for the road.

I've heard a saying that goes something along the lines of, "When in Rome..." Well, today I visited Rome, and it was tasty! I really am glad, though, that Wendy's offers a Junior Baby Super Small Frosty, because even I don't need that much frozen goodness. Still being full from breakfast, this is the entirety of my lunch, though I did bum a few fries here and there. 

Double Vision

Don't worry, you're not seeing things and you're not time traveling (a common occurrence on the Internet). This breakfast consists of leftovers from the past few days - all of which are egregiously carb dense. I'm not sure I've had any real brotein in weeks.