Alright, all creepy dog cartoon references aside, eggs are REALLY great. Like really, really great. And on days where you destroy yourself in the gym, eggs combined with a few carbs and some wholesome fats really can't be beat. And as it so happens, that is EXACTLY what happened today! Imagine that! But anyway, I'm getting ahead of myself. So, let's back up, and take things nice and slow.
A good place to get started for the day is breakfast. I had my ever more usual breakfast of two 86% cocoa dark chocolate squares. It really is worth it. All those healthy antioxidants, and at a rock bottom price of...amazing flavor!
I didn't eat again until around noon, when I had my again ever more usual two protein granola bars. This also served as my pre-workout for the day, as I went to the gym directly afterward. Recently, I decided to start attending bro sessions three times a week instead of just two. With this increase in time afforded to getting huge, I can expand my repertoire of lifts to also include some leg stuff! See, unfortunately, acting like a bro in the gym can lead to an excess of upper body workouts. Right now, I'm probably right around the likes of the 60 watt club. But, through perseverance and hard work, I can even myself out and dim down low enough to join the 25 watt club. But I'll take strength. Mental strength.
But so, upon returning to my bro den, barely able to walk, and in need of dire gains, I turned to a quick source of carbs to quicken the muscle recovery process. Now, don't judge me too hard, but I ate two slices of bread. Just bread. But here's where it gets interesting. In order to more efficiently deliver the carbs to my muscles (i.e. eat the bread as fast as possible), I have devised two methods, as shown below.
The first method, shown on the left in the photo above, is the roll technique. Simply fold the slice of bread in half, then roll along the long edge. Proceed to eat like a distantly-related snack food item. The other method, illustrated on the right in the photo above, is the "roll and squeeze" method. First, crudely roll the bread into a loose ball. Then, take the bread ball in your fist and squeeze your little heart out. Additional rolls and squeezes may be needed, but usually one is enough. Then place entire bread ball into mouth, chew a few times, and swallow. Of the two methods, I find the latter to be most effective at carb-to-muscle transit expedition.
But now on to the real gains story of the day. The way above-mentioned allusion to pure gains (eggs) was just what I really needed. Specifically, I needed this egg, cheese, potato, ham, gravy, cottage cheese, and onion casserole. Gains = deliciousness. What more could a bro ask for?!
But, even after these amazing gains, I still felt a little torn down. I felt weak, and muscles were screaming at me. So, being the wonderfully understanding muscle landlord ever, I listened to their demands. Here is what I provided them.
But don't assume that I just stuffed my face with sugar. This really wasn't THAT much. One little truffle, one small chocolate square, and not even a single serving of ice cream. All in all, the bro assessment: it was just enough.
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